"It's really that simple!"
The 7 Golden Rules of Sales and Marketing:
- List things. People like lists because they're EASY.
- Pretend to give a shit about your stupid customers.
- Feed their ego by calling them "boss" and "chief" (especially if they're Native American).
- Use cliches and buzzwords. They're game changers!
- Act like you know what you're talking about. YOU DON'T.
- Keep it short. Nobody wants to read something that goes on and on and on. Let me tell you a story. I was driving up a mountain and I saw a UFO. That's when I crashed into a tree. Moral of the story: Keep your eyes on the road.
- Lie whenever possible.
- Keep calling and hanging up constantly. It's fun.
- Exploit women.