Government

Like any smart business, Hooba Canoes Industries has a deep financial interest in politics. That's why we lobby (i.e. employ) top government official drones to influence policy for the benefit of our shareholders.

Restructuring the law is a top priority for our investors. We've funded the expansion "trespassing law" as a ploy to indenture our workforce and reduce payroll. We've even coined the term "contractual warfare" for our contributions to the proliferation of so-called "unfair" contracts. One man's unfair contract is another CEO's fair contract. 

Live and let live (if your contract permits)

Our influence of government has allowed the legalization of "applicant bots".  Applicant bots are computer programs that apply to all available job postings. These bots are even able to trick employers over the phone and in webcam interviews (often posing as sexy ladies). This process artificially saturates the workforce making it harder for biological job seekers to find jobs. This, in turn, creates higher competition by weeding out anyone who cannot defeat our applicant bots. It also allows employers to offer lower wages due to the inflated demand of all open positions.