WASHINGTON - BREAKING: President Trump's Health Department is preparing to release an official document defining life as “beginning at pussy grab” — a move that could signal incoming actions against abortion, contraception, and not getting sexually assaulted by presidents and creeps.
WASHINGTON - President Trump on Wednesday lashed out over a critical NBC News report and is now calling for the complete destruction of all TV sets, fax machines, vacuum's, or any other "confusing technology" capable of broadcasting what he calls "fake news".
Alabama - Trump is urging NFL team owners to fire any non-white player who kneels during national anthem.
BERKELEY, CA - UC Berkeley riot organizers have invited instigators Steve Bannon, Milo Yiannopoulos, and Ann Coulter for a fun day of rioting.
WASHINGTON - At approximately 2pm ET, senator Ted Cruz (R-Texas) took the Senate floor to present a nearly 2 hour Kama Sutra lesson.
The country is shocked yet again as President Trump signs a memo today to instate a ban on car transmissions.
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